Hello again.

So it’s been about 4 years since I updated this blog. With everything going on with Ruby and the beginning of our journey into Sensory Processing Disorder I thought now was a good time to start writing again. Hopefully this will help people understand what we are going through and keep people up to date. Or maybe I’m just talking into the void and that’s okay too.

Since Ruby was a baby she craved movement, hated loud noises, and often hated hugs and kisses. She has been the kid that had to climb to the top of everything, ran everywhere, and screamed or sang at the top of her lungs. She could be super brave one minute and scared to death when a loud motorcycle rode by. Often exciting times would cause her to get so overwrought she would have tantrums. It wasn’t uncommon for them to last up to an hour and involve her hitting, bitting, and kicking me. She could go between being able to have a conversation with us to barely being able to speak a word. The hardest thing and the thing that triggered me the most was it seemed like she never listened to me.

For a long time I’ve felt like I was failing as a parent. I would go from being a gentle AP parent to a yelling crazy parent and feeling terrible, because I just couldn’t understand why she couldn’t be quiet or sit still. Looking back at some of my mom meltdowns makes me feel horrible. Also looking back I realize that I was in denial and that I was inadvertently making things harder on her. What finally woke me up is when she started having trouble at school. Her teacher noticed how she shut down every time she corrected Ruby and the noises she couldn’t control. The breaking point was the day after Halloween when was she very rude all day long and pushed a couple kids. It seems minor, but it was so off for Ruby that both her teacher and I knew something was wrong. That night I really looked at Sensory Processing Disorder. I didn’t just stop reading when I got to a symptom that didn’t match. So much of it fit her and I couldn’t deny it anymore.

For so long I have mentally cataloged her unusual behavior and every time I saw it my anxiety increased. Finally figuring out that it’s a sensory issue has greatly shifted my perspective and lessened that anxiety. I also realize that I’m a far better parent than I’ve given myself credit for, because as much I could make it hard I also created an environment where she could cope and feel safe.

So our next step is get evaluated and find a good occupational therapist. In the mean time I’m trying to listen to her and help however I can. She bounces a lot on a mini trampoline and an exercise ball. I don’t stop noises unless it’s super loud and I’m trying to have lots of sensory experiences available for her. She has noise canceling headphones. The first time she put them on she smiled and said I can’t hear anything. Today was the first day she wore them to school and I just got a message from her teacher that she had an excellent morning. Her teacher has been amazing and helpful. I feel like we are so lucky that Ruby is in her class.

Lots of people have said that they hope she doesn’t lose her uniqueness. Our goal is to help her be herself even more. I realize now how much she struggled to get through the day and how truly amazing she is doing when there are plenty of times when it felt like a noise was going to literally kill her or that she was so overwhelmed she couldn’t remember what just happened.

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One week

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I can’t believe that Milo has been here for a week already. The transition to two kids has for the most part been easy. I say this now and will probably change my tune once Dan goes back to work and I get to learn to navigate everyday life with the two of them. Milo for right now is a very chilled baby. He eats, sleeps and poops. Sometimes he tries to do all three at one time. Ruby is her sweet self, but some ornery is creeping in. I know she is working on what it means to not be the only child, so I am trying to be as patient as possible. It can be trying at times for sure.
I realize that I am not a good blogger, because I forget to write down the blogs I write in my head. I had one about the pressure you feel to have the “perfect natural” birth and all the other things we set our selves up for before we give birth. I also thought I should share Milo’s birth story like I did Ruby’s, but right now I am just content listening to my babies breathe while they nap. I have lofty intentions of writing about my journey into being a stay at home mom, so hopefully you all will hear more from me soon.

25 weeks part2

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I realized that I have done little in the way of keeping track of this pregnancy. With Ruby I took photos weekly and bored you all with every detail. Poor Milo is already getting the second baby treatment. At first it was easy to get caught up in life and forget that I was pregnant. Now he moves so much I can’t possibly forget. It sort of scares me that he and Ruby are going to run me ragged. I suppose like everything you make do and forget how easy your life was with only child.

For now I am enjoying my time with Ruby. I know that brain development in the first years is fast, but boy does she amaze me sometimes. The other day out of the blue she told me “I like read moon”. It seems like last week she was just learning to say moon and now she is forming sentences with it. This age can be challenging, but I have to say it is my favorite. I love seeing her figure things out and start to become her own person. Of course with that comes stubbornness and tantrums, but I get through them be reminding myself that it is part of growing up. That mostly works and when it doesn’t I just try to remember how cute she is the rest of the time.

Hmm, I did intend to write about Milo, but I suppose it is easier to talk about the kid you know. I am getting pretty excited to meet him. Will he be an chilled baby, is he going to cry all of the time, and how the heck will I juggle two kids in the evening by myself. I suppose again I will figure it out and soon I will forget what life was like before. Nice how that works out.

9 months

ImageRuby had her 9 month checkup and she has gained 3 pounds and 1.5 inches since her 6 month checkup. It still amazes me what a difference a couple of months makes, heck even a couple of weeks.  I swear that overnight she went from rolling over to crawling and pulling up on everything in sight.  Although the best skill is her being able to say momma and dadda.  Nothing melts your heart more than seeing that little monkey crawling towards you hollering momma.  Even if I am trying to make dinner or some other task that needs to be done.  Now if I only we could put sleeping through the night on the list I would be a truly happy momma.  We had one night so I know it is possible.

ImageThis week begins my new schedule at work and I am excited that I will have three day weekends.  I have lofty thoughts of getting out of town more often and yet getting more done around the house.  We will see which one wins out.  Top on the list is getting the basement ready for football season.  It will be a work in progress, but it is worth it for Dan to have his mancave.
Speaking of Dan, I am sure that I have mentioned that I think he is the bee’s knees before in my blog, but I have to take a moment and say it again.  He has started reading to Ruby before she goes to bed and I love hearing them spend time together.  She does spend more time trying to eat the books then listening to the stories, but I am sure it won’t be long before she is asking for more.  I know that being a mom has made me mushy, but it melts my heart to see how much they love each other.

Easy Summer Headband

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A non-baby update! I have been living in the same cotton head band all summer, so I thought I would finally get around to making a new one. This one works up fast and the pattern can be easily changed to make it fit any head. I haven’t written a crochet pattern in a long time, so I am a little rusty. Please let me know if any of this doesn’t make sense.

Supplies:

DK cotton yarn of your choice. The one pictured is Knit One Crochet Two 2nd Time Cotton

G 4.mm hook

Darning needle to weave in ends.

1 button.

Cross Double Crochet (CrDc)- Working over 2 dc, skip the first dc, work one dc in the second dc, go back to first dc and work one dc.

Directions:

Ch. 9

Row 1- Work one dc in the second chain from the hook and each one after. 8 stitches

Row 2-9- Turn and chain 2. Work one dc over each 8 dc.

Row 10- Turn and chain 2. Work two dc in first stitch, work one dc in the next 6 dc, two dc in last stitch. 10 stitches

Row 11. Turn and Chain 2. Work one row of dc over 10 stitches.

Row 12. Turn and chain 2. Work two dc in first stitch, work one dc in the next 8 dc, two dc in last stitch. 12 stitches

Row 13. Turn and Chain 2. Work one row of dc over 12 stitches.

Row 14-20- Turn and Chain 2. Work one dc in the first 4 dc, work 2 CrDc over the next 4 dc, one dc in the last 4 dc.

Row 21-Turn and Chain 2. Work one row of dc over 12 stitches.

Row 22- Turn and Chain 2. Decrease one stitch over first 2 dc, dc in the next 8 dc, decrease one stitch over the last 2 dc. 10 stitches

Row 23- Turn and Chain 2. Work one row of dc over the next 10 stitches

Row 24- Turn and Chain 2. Decrease one stitch over first 2 dc, dc in the next 6 dc, decrease one stitch over the last 2 dc. 8 stitches

Row 25-37- Turn and Chain 2. Work one dc over each 8 dc.

Finishing:

Weave in ends.

Sew button on the shorter side in the middle of the fourth row. I didn’t include a button hole, because the stitches are loose enough to put the button through. This means that you can easily adjust the tightness of the band. You could also make the ends longer and tie the band if you don’t want to mess with the button.

I did find that the cotton tends to stretch out a little once worn. I just threw mine in the wash with hot water and shrunk it back to the original size.

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6 months part 2

Today she really is 6 months old and I am floored by how fast the time has gone.  Yes, in the beginning I couldn’t wait until we got out of the newborn stage, but now I want the time to slow down so I can savor every moment of it. I am pretty sure that won’t happen and I will have to just have to hang on for the crazy ride ahead.

Let’s see, she is starting to eat solid food with mixed results.  Avocado has gotten the best reaction, but even that is just tolerated. Sweet potatoes are next on the menu and will hopefully be better received.  Rolling over has gotten easier and has become the fun new thing to do all of the time, even at bad times like while nursing. I can’t say that she enjoys the fact that she is then on her tummy, but that hasn’t stopped her yet or encouraged her to be better at flipping back to her back.  Rolling the other way always seems accidental and a little scarier.  The latest major milestone is being able to sit up unassisted.  She is still wobbly and can’t be left alone doing it, but everyday she gets a little stronger.

As for me, well it is easy to forget about me sometimes and focus on Ruby, but I am trying not to get lost.  I feel like I have settled into motherhood well and it is, mostly, everything I thought it was going to be.  I think I had romantic notions of being able to get 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep and now I realize that won’t happen for a couple more years.  I have finally got back into the gym and changed my diet back to being healthy.  Consequently, I have lost 6 pounds and am officially back below my pre-pregnancy weight.  I would have lots clothes to wear if it weren’t for the fact that pregnancy changed the shape of my body. Do they tell you that before you have a kid? I am sure I heard it somewhere, but I figured it wouldn’t happen to me.

There are lots of things that change once you have a baby some good some bad, but I will take all of them.  I hate to get sappy, but I could not imagine life without that little lady now.  I also can’t imagine life without her daddy.  We just celebrated our second anniversary and I am pretty amazed at all that we have gone through together and how much I love him.  I love watching him play with Ruby and seeing how excited they both get when they see each other. It is easy to forget about things that could get you down or minor annoyances in life once you get home and see their smiling faces.  I would like to say that I will blog more, but I probably won’t. Life is a little busier now and that is a-okay with me.

6 months!

Alright I am jumping the gun just a little, but I am having a rare moment where I feel like blogging and the little lady is asleep.  I have to say that this what I imagined motherhood to be like and as much I loved her the newborn stage is just not my favorite.  I love seeing her working on and finally getting new skills.  I don’t want her to group up too quickly and I really am trying to savor every moment, but I can’t help but be excited to see her grow and change.  Although I have to admit that I am not looking forward to the tantrum phase, because she already lets it known when she is not pleased.  Oh poop she is awake now.  I  will try to post again soon.